KILLREAL.txt

The Rupert Holmes of the Carpantians

The Rupert Holmes of the Carpantians. (the adventures of...) He bounces off the sky. Twirls sticks like fire. Loves the lovers and loves to hate the loving lovers that he loves so dearly and lovingly. Powerful squid injection. I remember when I was a child, the first time I ever masturbated . Me and Papa just got back from fishin' at O'Leary's pond. We sat down in front of the TV and sucked back a few Zimas. I looked down at my cock in a drunken stupor. It had grown to 23 times it's normal size and was pulsating a glowing red color. An ounce or two of pre-cum was leaking out of my pee-hole. I tapped dear old Dad on the shoulder and pointed to my flaming erection. He jumped up and exclaimed, "that's super! Now go in the bathroom and jack it off!!" I couldn't wait any longer; I didn't even move off the couch before I started stroking my erection in front of my own Dad. He was shocked to see my little hand stroking my abnormally huge penis. Well, since it was my first time, I shot my first load pretty quickly and abundantly. Big sticky globs hit me, Dad and the TV. The whole room was drenched in my gooey sperm. I sighed. THE END. I can't believe all these cowboy sissys that are bothering me lately. Wherever I go, those cowboys whistle at my perfectly shaped ass. I think they all want to touch it. I won't let them. I feel it's better for them to dream without ruining it with reality. Excuse me while I kill my reality.