Brand Name - Verse 23

Buy or die

One day Bunny and Bucky were out on the town shopping for the latest Brand Name products when a very nice man approached them. He was dressed in a fine suit made of silk imported from the Orient. He wore very dark sunglasses which made him appear "mysterious". Bunny and Bucky were dumbfounded. Never before have they seen such a display of nicety and manliness in one person. The man confused them with idle chat and seduced them into coming over to his penthouse suite over on 42nd Avenue. As the airy glass elevator darted toward the top floor of the 566 story skyscraper, Bunny and Bucky were treated to a splendid view of North Manhattan. The hordes of people walking on the street below seemed miniscule compared to the great, happy structures that were built cleverly around them. The sky became dark for the elevator passed through the stratosphere and the oxygen supply system kicked in. The elevator doors finally opened after what seemed like an eternity exposing one of the greatest spectacles Bunny or Bucky had ever seen. The mystery man told the two awestruck girls to put on these awkward coveralls and helmets which made them look like the just stepped off the Space Shuttle. The world Bunny and Bucky were about to enter would change them for life. The two youngsters entered the foyer of the man's house and found a virtual cornucopia of Brand Name products; much more exciting and thought provoking than the chocolate factory of Willy Wonka they had visited a week earlier. In the background played a medley of top 40 smash hits which led Bunny and Bucky to believe that they were, in fact, in heaven. The two jovial girls started tapping their feet and snapping their fingers to the tunes of Huey Luis and the News. Dokken, Madonna, Robert Palmer, the B52's, Cindy Lauper, Smashing Pumpkins, White Snake, David Lee Roth, the Cars, the GoGos, Led Zepplin, Foreigner, and Salt 'n' Pepa. The man removed his sunglasses revealing his true identity as Jonny Dep. Bunny and Bucky were in la-la land! They knew Jonny Dep was in charge of that new Brand Name product campaign and boy, were they happy! Jonny brought them some store-brand sodas from the kitchen and invited them into the comfy living room which was abound by Brand Name products of every conceivable kind. Even the picture frames were Brand Name products. Jonny insisted that the two girls become the new 1999 Brand Name poster girls. Without even finishing the entire sentence the girls agreed, a contract was signed and they were off to Hollywood for their first picture shoot. The funny thing of it was, the two forgetful girls missed work that day and were put on "probation".

xome

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