Bird Poop

We must shield our heads.

Do you think that birds someday could evolve to such a point where evil birds emerge that practice and practice until they become very skillful at shitting on people? The evil ones would develop clever ways of darting out of the sky toward a group of humans on the ground then releasing feces at the precise time so the entire crowd gets shit on them. Maybe, on the other hand, the birds will eventually be able to use toilets or merely choose one central point where all the birds in the area could go and take a shit. But, for sake of argument, lets say that they choose to fuck with humans. Perhaps by the time the birds evolve to that point, humans also will have evolved so that there is a shield of sorts extending off the top of our skulls coated with teflon so that when the bird tries to shit on your head and the shield intercepts the offending doo, humans can easily wipe the teflon shield with paper towels. Possibly we will be forced to install paper towel dispensers around heavily populated areas to facilitate easy removal of the disgusting poop from our shields.