X Baby

Another true story in an airport

There's nothng in the world like the feeling of having a Cricket lighter slowly pushed into your asshole. The way it slides so smoothly with a slight muscular resistance from your sphincter is hundreds of times better than your favorite emotion or a plate of steamed oysters. For extra added enjoyment, try to get your hands on a copy of a telephone directory of the greater Saigon area (in Vietnamese, of course,) and begin reading the names out loud from page one while this little lighter ritual is being performed on you. Wow. What a funky thing to do.

      Your friend,

      -Ron the one armed oyster eater